1/3/11 Katie's Healthy Eating Journal: Monday

Today was my first day back at school.  I have really been dreading it for several reasons: I was afraid I was going to have a meltdown from being overwhelmed with work I need to catch up on, it was the first day of realization that I no longer get to be with my son all day anymore, and actually saying good-bye to my son this morning with the understanding that we won't have day in and day out of time together until the summer.  So many people say it and it is so true: kids grow up so fast and so it's important to cherish every minute.  My baby feels so big already and it's only been 3 months! Someone today was telling me that all the sudden when babies are just about a year old you wake up one morning and that baby smell is gone.  I can't even imagine it; if you don't have kids it sounds crazy, but I can't stop smelling him.  I have such mixed feelings.  On on hand I hate to leave my baby, on the other hand, I like the routine and socialization of work.  It was emotional kissing FJ good-bye and watching him leave in the car but as soon as I got in my own car to go to work I was able to get a handle on my emotions.  Once I had gotten half-way through the day I realized, I've got this, I can totally do this.  I counted down every minute until I could see my son but a weight had been lifted off my chest.  All the anxiety that had been building about this day had finally arrived and I had survived it with flying colors.  I missed the kids, my co-workers, the routine and feeling good at something again.  Being a mom is constantly questioning if you're doing the right thing and it can start to eat away at your self-esteem.  Further and further into the day my self-confidence was redeemed.  It's a constant argument in my head.  Work makes me feel good about myself but I dread getting up and leaving my son for the day again.  Hopefully every day will get easier and easier.  I'm comforted by knowing that we are lucky enough to have family watching him.  

MONDAY

Breakfast - 

JC French Toast with 1/4 cup sugar-free syrup

Banana

1 cup fat-free organic milk

Snack - 

JC Oatmeal Raisin Anytime bar

Lunch - 

JC Cheesy Enchilada

Celery, carrots, cauliflower with fat-free ranch

Snack - 

Blueberry Applesauce Cup

Dinner - 

JC Chicken Fajitas

Salad (mixed greens, peppers, mushrooms) 2 tbsp. light ranch

Snack - 

JC Caramel Peanut Butter Bar